


Maybe.

by orphan_account



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: IM NOT IN THIS SHIP FANDOM THING ANYMORE SORRY I JUST DONT LIKE UNFINISHED STUFF, Kinda, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Septiplier - Freeform, Unrequited Love, its sad i think, jack is kinda pissed, mark is sad, mentions of amy and signe but theyre brief, mostly just mark bein sad i guess, not really - Freeform, one sided septiplier, they argue about septiplier and then Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2017-04-26
Packaged: 2018-10-24 09:21:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10738776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It started with an argument. Useless screaming, anger, blame placing over something neither of them controlled. It ended with all the terrible emotions in Mark's chest crushing him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> k. its kinda sad i guess ik ive said im not into septiplier anymore (and im not) but i just read something from an author on here i like and it was so sad so i just,,,, did a thing. i think i might write a second chapter bc i wanted to continue but that felt like a better place to stop. idk i wrote this on a whim.

"Do you have any fucking idea what you've DONE!"

"What I'VE done? What the fuck do you mean? YOU started this, Mark!" 

Mark let out an angry huff that crackled over the skype call. "You didn't have to go along! You could've said something!" 

"Neither did you! You should've told me the second you started getting uncomfortable. This isn't my fault!"

At that, Mark deflated. Flopping back into his chair from where he had been sitting straight up in anger and sinking into it. They'd been at this for a while, a childish yelling match with no purpose. Jack rubbed a hand over his eyes and sighed.

"Maybe... Maybe we should just stop."

"What?" Mark questioned.

"Well... It's like... Maybe if we stopped, I don't know, making videos together or tweeting eachother as much maybe it would just... Drop?" It sounded stupid even to his own ears but it was the only thing Jack could think of.

For a few minutes, Mark didn't know what to say. He didn't want to do that! The guilt was already eating at him for yelling at Jack, blaming him for this mess. He didn't want to have to just cut him off.

"I... I guess." He said in spite of it. Jack sighed again, leaning forward on his elbows and rubbing his eyes with his fingers.

"This is stupid." Mark could hear the exhaustion in his voice. "We arent together, we DON'T like eachother that way. We could try to just deal with it again but it's exhausting. And annoying."

He might've said something after that, but Mark didn't hear it. /We don't like eachother that way/. No, he really didn't. Mark felt something heavy settle in his chest as he blew out all the breath in his lungs. It wasn't news to him but hearing Jack say it, especially with such anger and annoyance, it hurt. A lot. Mark didn't know what the stirring jn in his chest that happened when Jack laughed was, but he didn't trust it. Nor did he trust the way his stomach flipped over when Jack said his name or how he'd be so giddy and nervous he'd make himself sick before he got to see Jack at cons.

Maybe this was for the best. Maybe if they just ignored eachother for a while, it would disappear. No one would care about it anymore and Mark's mystery emotions would be a thing of the past.

"I know. I'm sorry, Jack. For this.... And for yelling. I know it isn't your fault. It isnt anyone's fault. I guess we'll just... let this all blow over?"

Jack's lips quirked up a bit. "Glad you agree." He said brightly. 

"So... I guess I'll talk to you later?"

Jack's smile faltered and Mark barely caught his last word before he ended their Skype call. 

"Maybe."

That was it. Mark's insides disappeared, leaving him feeling hollow and floaty. The weight of the word and the thought that maybe this had done something irreversible tore at his heart as tears pricked behind his eyes. When he spoke, his voice was a shaky whisper that sounded nothing like his usually booming, confident voice. 

"...Goodbye, Sean."

And then he broke.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi i sorta forgot to ever finish writing this but i found this mostly completed in my drafts so i finished it off. not exactly happy w the way i portray amy and mark, however brief. i want to say i mean no disrespect, their relationship is really wonderful and the weird wording of my bad writing is my fault only. im really not into septiplier anymore ffbgjf but i just want to finish these off. alright enjoy

It had been a few months. At the start, Mark had kept track of how long it had been, but found it to do more harm than good. So now, at the end of a seemingly infinite stretch of time, Mark was here.  
They hadn't spoken again since their call. Mark had sent Jack exactly three Twitter messages before the man had stopped responding. They didn't film together or tweet each other, didn't interact at all in the public eye. Jack no longer even liked his pictures on Instagram.  
It had been difficult at first. Not talking to Jack had proven to be a great challenge for Mark. Within the first two weeks, Mark had sat himself down and forced himself to sort out the feelings in his head.  
He liked Jack. A lot. He liked the way he smiled, the way his eyes shone with energy and determination. He liked his loud laugh and silly sense of humor and the way he used to send Mark a good morning message every day. He liked his nervous ticks and when he tugged at the skin of his neck or ran a hand through his hair. Mark LIKED Jack. The realization was so overwhelming, he'd felt his world shift upside down as he hunched over and clutched his stomach. He liked Jack. And now they weren't even talking.  
After that it had been almost unbearable. "Don't think about Jack. Don't text him. He doesn't want to talk to you." Mark struggled to keep himself motivated as he realized how deeply his feelings ran while knowing that Jack would never reciprocate them.  
His content took a sharp turn at one point. This was the week Mark could barely drag himself out of bed to fight the suffocating weight of self pity that had lodged itself in his chest. He didn't know how to change this, but he wanted the feelings gone.  
When Mark's energy returned, he made the most of it. He cleaned his entire house, cleaned himself up, muted Jack on Twitter, and signed up for an online dating website.  
"Out of sight, out of mind." He muttered as he clicked the tiny blue speaker before switching the tab to the intimidating registration form that stared at him. He could do this.  
Over time, he felt better. He no longer let intrusive thoughts of Jack control his mood. He liked the younger man yes, but as a friend. And only a friend now. Any hint of attraction that dared rear its head was shoved down and locked away. At one point Mark even got a girlfriend, a pretty ginger girl, smaller than him but twice as fierce. It didn't last long.  
When Mark finally started feeling like he was over it, over Jack, he started to slowly let parts of him return. He checked the man's Twitter, quickly unclicking the mute button and scrolled lazily through his Instagram feed for a minute. Mark wasn't sure how big their... problem still was, but he'd decided it be easier to figure out with the other man. Then, building up his courage, he opened a message to Jack. Quickly doing the math in his head and discovering it would be late in the morning in Ireland, he tapped out a cheery "Good morning!" on shaky fingers. It was like nothing had even happened. Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, Mark pressed send.  
-  
When the both of them decided their interaction could go back to normal , it was like nothing had ever happened. Jack jumped and sang and yelled on their Skype call as the filmed their first video together in ages. If Mark found himself hastily stamping down bubbles of happiness at Jack's laughter, that was no one's business but his own. Things returned to normal and all was well.  
But it really wasn't.  
-  
This day had been particularly bad. The night before Mark had dreamed something silly, something safe. Jack's voice, soft and kind, saying the most loving things to him. He woke up happy, but his mood soon soured as he realized what his brain had done. Rubbing his hands over his face, Mark groaned as he rolled onto his side and curled up. He just wanted this to go away. He didn’t want to like Jack. Every time he thought the feelings were fading something like this happened and that stupid longing showed up in his chest again. Mark pulled his knees up to his chest and reached for his phone. Swiping it open, Mark checked his email and social media, steadfastly ignoring the ache pressing on his heart. While scrolling halfheartedly through instagram, Mark froze  
Oh.  
There on the screen was Jack, smiling brightly next to a pretty girl with sharp eyeliner and long hair. They both looked ecstatic and as Mark read the caption he could feel his heart sink. Jack had made no mention that he’d found a girlfriend, let alone that she was moving in with him. It wasn’t exactly his business, but Mark thought maybe Jack considered them friends enough to tell him this?

Mark tried to be happy for them, but the stupid feelings that his stupid dream had forced up were suffocating him. He was devastated and angry, at both Jack and himself. He didn't know what to do. He couldn’t express his feelings and locking them away obviously wasn’t working for him.

For the first time in a while, Mark felt hot tears sting his eyes as he thought of Jack.

-

When he met her, his heart fluttered in his chest and his brain short circuited. She was gorgeous, with dyed blonde hair and a bright smile. The way she held herself and the eloquent way she spoke just added to her beauty. They hit it off immediately and soon he found himself dating possibly the most amazing girl in the world.

He was in love and he was happy… but sometime. Sometimes you can't control your emotions. When his smothered feeling for Jack reared their ugly head, he would fight them, shoving them down to suffocate under the blanket of denial he shrouded himself in.

It was young, unrequited love. Really that was all. Jack would never feel anything for him and he would move on, plain and simple. He’d survive, loving Amy because that's what his heart wanted, even if it sometimes betrayed him. Maybe he’d never get over his still mostly unexplained feelings, maybe he’d grow and they’d crumble and float away in the wind.

Maybe.

**Author's Note:**

> comments are very much appreciated so i know how to improve! i promise im trying to work on part of you i really am. im gonna do it soon, maybe this weekend bc i have exams the rest of the week. no promises though. thanks for reading <<33 (also i think this might be like super short but idk bc i wrote it on the ao3 thing instead of google docs)


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